Hates Her Bedtime Routine
Q: I'm getting serious with this girl, serious enough that I spend most nights at her place. She likes to watch TV in bed, which is fine, but she's addicted to crime drama series. I like these shows well enough, but what I don't like is hooking up after. An hour of watching criminal cases isn't exactly my idea of an aphrodisiac. Do I just have to get over this hang up, or can ask her to cut out this part of her routine? And more importantly, am I the weird one or is she? — Eric, 24
Dr. Susan: Neither of you is all that weird. I'm sure that many couples try to couple up directly after watching the news on TV, or else some other show that one of them likes much more than the other. You should be able to work this out by compromising. Use the DVR to save her favorite crime dramas, and then space them out so it's not an everyday routine. Figure out how you would prefer to get in the mood, and add that to your nightly activity. What might you both enjoy that would not take either of you too far from the mood for intimacy? A few minutes of watching something sexy to act as a transition? Or she could start teasing you a bit as her show winds down. Or she could watch her shows earlier on some nights. If you're both solutions-oriented, understanding, and willing to compromise, this shouldn't be a major obstacle for you.
Copyright © Fun Online Corporation
Advice for Her
Advice for Him
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.