Her Indecision Killing Him

Q: My girlfriend is amazing, but she never has an opinion on where we should go and what we should do for dates. When I suggest an activity or a restaurant, she always replies with, "I don't care" and "whatever you want." It stresses me out because I don't get a sense of what she really wants and likes. I feel pressure that if the evening doesn't go well or the restaurant isn't good then it's my fault. Thoughts?

Dr. Anna: The way you're feeling is totally reasonable. A good relationship is one of equality—both people giving input and making decisions together. If she can't voice any preferences, then things quickly get out of balance and it does put all the pressure on you. If you want to change it up, talk to her about how her lack of input on your activities is making you feel. Even if she has no preferences, it's reasonable to ask her to make decisions sometimes. If after an honest conversation, nothing changes, it might be time to consider whether this is the right match for you.

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