Money Sharing Woes

Q: Having just gotten married, my wife says that we should get a joint back account. After all, she says, everyone does that when they get married. But I don't know how I feel about it. I will do it obviously because I am not about to rock the boat. I just like privacy and don't need her asking me every time I take money out of the account or make a purchase. I can see that getting very annoying quickly. -Derrick, 30

Dr. Anna: Disagreements about money are a major killer for relationships. So is staying silent about things you disagree about. You two need to sit down and have a serious conversation as soon as possible if you want to get things moving in a better direction. You need to talk about budgeting, money spending habits, and record keeping. Successful couples can choose any variety of options, from combining everything into one shared pot, to creating a shared account for household expenses and each contributing a certain amount, to keeping everything separate permanently. Keeping silent about your concerns is a sure fire way to build up unhappiness and resentment in the long run. Having an open and honest conversation now about how you each want to spend and keep track of money will help prevent major problems down the line.

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