Does Your Date Measure Up?
First dates can have that awkward high-pressure feel of job interviews. But on a date you're expected to be much less direct in trying to figure out if this person is worth your time. You can't exactly ask outright, "Hey, what kind of husband do you think you'll be?"
Want a more subtle way to know if you could get serious? Here are five things to look for before dessert arrives.
A reason to get out of bed in the morning.
It could be a job they love or a passion for rock-climbing. Maybe it's a beloved dog or cat (even a particularly demanding houseplant). It's the screenplay they're writing or a mission to make the world's best chocolate chip cookies. Passion - not just the bedroom kind, but the kind that just makes you really excited about life - is important.
A good relationship resume.
A partner with potential will have a history of relationships that last longer than a playoff season, can talk about past partnerships without sounding resentful (or referring to all exes as "crazy") and shows a few insights into those relationships' successes and failures.
A sense of humor.
He doesn't have to be cracking knock-knock jokes (actually, it's better if he doesn't). But if you're not having fun, what's the point? Studies show laughter can diffuse tension and keep problems in perspective. If you and your date can't share a few laughs, it's unlikely you'll share more than a few dates.
A little curiosity.
A great date conversation won't be one-sided; your date will be just as interested in learning about you as you are about them. A promising date will be interested in your thoughts, in why you did whatever you did, where you want to go on your next vacation, what book you're reading.
At least a little chemistry.
You don't have to be copping a feel in the nearest coat closet, but something (or everything!) about this person should give you a little zing! of sexual excitement. Doesn't matter if it's her smile or the way he smells, you need to have at least a little chemistry. All the on-paper potential in the world won't make up for lacking that.
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