By Laura Snyder

Whether it’s in the movies or the media, there are lots of faulty facts out there when it comes to the subject of love. Are you ready for a reality check?

Love Myth #1: You can’t be in love with two people at once.

Are you serious? That’s like saying you can’t like cake and ice cream at the same time, as if loving one prevents you from loving the other. Consider this a cultural thing – in Europe, it’s perfectly okay to be polyamorous. Of course, we’re not suggesting that makes it any easier…

Love Myth #2: All you need is love.

Love – while grand – is not the duct tape of the heart. Love has the bonding properties of a slightly tattered and linty stretch of Scotch tape; it might do the job for awhile, but you better not be counting on it to hold anything together long term. Love’s a great start, but totally useless until you can also communicate, understand each other, and solve problems.

Love Myth #3: Love is hard.

No, love is work. Maybe not easy work, either, but it shouldn’t be hard. Or painful. Or something that you’re not enthusiastically willing to work though to make things better.

Love Myth #4: There’s a “best” or “right” way to fall in love.

You should be friends first. You should fall in love at first sight. Take it slow. If it’s true love, you’ll know right away. Ugh. Why are we still letting people tell us that one way to fall in love is somehow better or more likely to work than another? No matter what timetable it works on, whenever love shows up at your door, why not just be happy it got there at all?

Love Myth #5: Love is a feeling

Sure, love contains a lot of feelings – the butterflies-in-the-stomach joyous anxiety, that throbbing passion, the sappy heart-strings-pulling stuff – but at the end of the day, love is really an action. It’s about doing, not feeling, especially during the moments when you inconveniently lack those feelings that make your actions easier.