No Beans For Bonzo

In college, I dated this guy who had some weird food allergies. Whenever we went out, he had to quiz the staff as to what each dish had in it so that he wouldn't suffer an allergic reaction. Since this was both time consuming and somewhat embarrassing, I invited him over to my place one night and cooked for him. He provided me with a list of things he couldn't eat, and I made a meal around it. One of the things I made was a three-bean salad, since he was okay with all of the ingredients. He came over, and he loved the bean salad so much that he ended up eating four helpings of it. As we sat and watched TV after the meal, he began to pass some gas. After a while, it was nearly toxic in the room, and I had all the windows open just trying to breathe. He apologized and told me that while he wasn't allergic to beans, they did have this reaction in him. As tears were streaming down my face and I gasped for air, he finally went home. No more beans for him!

— Jolene, 25

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