Painful State of Panic

A friend of mine said he knew a girl who needed someone to DJ at her "English" party. So I told him to give her my number, and we could negotiate prices. Anyway, after talking prices, I told her I liked her voice and proceeded to chat up a storm. After about 2 hours, we agreed to an afternoon date for the upcoming weekend. When I called my friend back and told him what I had done, he started laughing and said, "She is f---ing ugly!" I was panicking. I couldn't figure out how to get out of the date. Anyway, my aunt was coming to see me that Saturday, and I set a plan in motion. I told my aunt about what had happened, and she agreed to go along with my plan to tell the English girl I wasn't home--that I had gone for my therapy and that I wasn't allowed visitors because of my mental condition. My apartment window faces the street entrance of my building, so my aunt and I stood looking out the window. Well, the girl showed up, and I panicked even more when it turned out that, lo and behold, she was the most ugly thing I'd ever seen. That's when I told my aunt I was really leaving the house. On the way down, I walked right past my date, and oh, man! I am still trying to get the image out of my head after 8 years. My aunt did her part, and guess what? The girl called me back later that night to tell me she still wanted to meet me because maybe she could help with my condition. I told her I was in too bad a condition to have a relationship, and that I would not be able to do her party, either.

— Ronnie, 31

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