Blind Online Date

Recently divorced for the second time, I decided to join a well known matchmaker online dating service. I exchanged emails and pictures for a few weeks with one woman in particular. She sent me a picture of herself with blonde hair, and she was petite. We seemed to hit it off, so we agreed to meet at a local bar and grill. I arrived and ordered a drink at the bar. I exchanged some small talk with the bartender, telling him that I was there for one of those blind online dates. Fifteen minutes passed when a dark haired, heavy set woman walked in and planted herself in the seat next to mine. She started jabbering away and was going on and on like we were long lost friends. I gave her a good ten minutes of non-stop gum flapping. As she was talking, I cut in to say that I needed to make a quick call. I took out my cell phone and proceeded to call the number of the woman I'm supposed to be meeting. Within a matter of seconds, the phone in the big girl's purse began to ring. Turns out, she is current version of the petite blonde in the picture. Oh my God, it was all I could do not to run out of there. The bartender looked at her, looked at me, burst out laughing, and walked away.

— Dave, 39

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