The Sexless Relationship

In many long term relationships, that got-to-have-you-now feeling can fade after awhile. If everything else is great - you're best friends, with lots in common and have fun together - but the sex has started to slide, should you settle for it, or say goodbye?

We ask: Do you need sex to cement your union, or is it just the icing on the cake?

He Says:

Stock photo for article.I think sex is very important to the relationship - it's the only thing you'll do together that's completely your own. It's a chance to be passionate, serious, playful and totally vulnerable with each other. Call me shallow and superficial, but I think it's a bad idea to continue to date someone who just doesn't do it for you. There are a lot of things in a relationship than you can learn and develop - like trust and respect - but if you don't have that "I have to have you right now" feeling, you're probably not ever going to. Great sex is what makes you more than just good friends. Meaning that if you're in a long relationship that's become asexual, you're... that's right... Just. Good. Friends.

She Says:

Stock photo for article.Sure, sex is important, but it's important to remember that heat will come and go when you're in a long relationship. Sometimes it may feel more like a bonfire... other times it's more like the smoldering embers of a nearly extinguished campfire. But as long as the fire hasn't gone out completely, there's no reason to throw away an otherwise great relationship just because things aren't as hot as they used to be. You just need to work harder on bringing back some spark (to carry the fire analogy to an even more annoying length) to keep those home fires burning.

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