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The Key to Long-Lasting Marital Bliss
 The key to long-lasting marital happiness sounds a bit jaded, but researchers from The Ohio State University and the University of Florida insist they've nailed it: Lower your expectations for marriage, and you won't be so disappointed with the relationship's normal ups and downs.
We tend to have such a rosy and romantic view of marriage that our unrealistic expectations for happily-ever-after are getting us into trouble.
The BBC News Online reports that couples who think their relationship is perfect are just setting themselves up to be knocked down once the wedding cake is eaten and the honeymoon is over. For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, we need to approach marriage with a more realistic view. And couples who do that are happier in the long run.
Eighty-two couples who had been married less than three months participated in the four-year study in which each spouse was independently questioned. Seventeen couples divorced by the end of the four years. Those who believed their partner would be unfailingly kind and loving and agree with their every word, managed to retain this positive outlook by being forgiving and having charitable explanations for their partner's negative behavior, reports the BBC. But those individuals who had extremely high expectations and did not have these excellent relationship skills, were more likely to be sorely disappointed with their one true love.
Oddly, the couples who were the most satisfied with their marriages were the ones who held the most prosaic view of their loved ones.
Satisfaction with marriage decreases when our expectations don't mesh with reality. Newlyweds, especially, have a tendency to think their relationships will be perfect--even in times of stress. That just sets them up for disappointment and dissatisfaction. Repeat this enough, and it can actually lead to divorce.
Best advice: Get your lover off the pedestal.
The study findings were published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
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