Four Make-Out Mistakes Men Make

Newsflash, guys: Women love kissing. And while, to you, making out may be just another landmark on the way to getting it on, to your lady, a great kiss says loads about what else you might have to offer. But if you're making these make-out mistakes, good luck getting past second base.

Lip Slip #1: Tongue Twisters

Your mama was right: It's rude to stick out your tongue. There's nothing more annoying than a guy whose reptilian tongue probes an unsuspecting mouth prematurely. You could take an eye out with that thing! And while we're on the subject of tongues, could you keep it in the shallow end of the pool for a bit? Apart from just generally being unsexy, shoving your tongue down a girl's throat - especially suddenly - could induce vomiting. Probably not the effect you were looking for.

Lip Slip #2: Jaw Breakers

Remember those nature videos you've seen where the snake unhinges its jaw to eat some cute little rodent whole? That's what we think of when a guy comes at us with a mouth open wide enough to warrant one of those warning signs they put on the back of trucks. Not sexy.

Lip Slip #3: Fresh Air

Kissing a mouth that reeks of stale cigarette smoke or morning breath is not a magic moment. But neither is making out with a mint factory. No amount of gum or candy will replace good, old fashioned brushing and flossing. (Don't forget the bacteria breeding grounds on your tongue and the roof of your mouth.)

Lip Slip #4: Goal-Oriented

When we became adults, suddenly "necking" became "foreplay." Which means that as soon as we get really caught up in your kissing, there's a hand sneaking up our shirt. You've clicked on the cruise control and steered the smooching to the final destination - sex. Instead of making your make-out session so goal-oriented, can't we just enjoy it for the fun it is? It's not like we won't have sex with you later anyway.

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Try These Pickup Lines

  • I will gladly marry you next Tuesday if we can have the honeymoon tonight.
  • You remind me of a doorknob on a freezing day. If I put my tongue on you, it's not coming off.
  • Falling for you would be a very short trip.
  • Would you like to play a game of hide the penis?
  • Here's a quarter to call heaven to let them know you're lost.